Absent fathers in our communities is not a new phenomenon.  Absent fathers in migration time is however a new concept.  Past thirty years we Iranians have lost the notion of nuclear families forever.  As much as the forceful migration is a factor, still we have no idea how much our parenting style has changed to the better and worse perhaps.
Migration and Diaspora among us Iranians impact not only our individual lives, but also our parenting duties.    There are a huge number of our Iranian children and youth living out of Iran, who have an absent father.  If back in those old days a few men would live elsewhere because of jobs, today thousands of families separate by choice or due to many societal problems.   Today many Iranian families are separated across continents, countries, and cities.  As much as absent fathers have excuses for not being with their children, yet single parenting for Iranian mothers create multiple problems.
There are fathers who are living and working in Iran. They come and visit their families wherever they are and they pay the costs of living for their families. Some others send their families abroad first hoping to join the family in a better time.
However, what about the fathering as a present, active, and interactive role?  Iranian men who for some reason are not available to support their growing youth, have less to say when it comes to the choice these youth make.  Sending money and encouraging children to attend universities may seem an ideal hard work for Iranian men, however their lack of understanding of these young children’s need are outstanding.  Money and universities are not doing what a parent can do. We miss the concept of giving our children a good start.  Migration has really caused us huge challenges, in all areas of life.  What is the solution? Hard to say.
May 4, 2009
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