The Role of Education is deep in our Iranian Life.
Education has always been a great part of our Iranian life. From an early age we have heard our families talking about the importance of higher education. Our parents may or many not have completed university studies, yet they always encouraged us to work hard for a higher education. We appreciate education and the status connected to it however, sometimes our children do not see things the same way; they do not follow the path we want them to.
Why not? Why do they not seek the same path?
As parents, we sometimes have to push or force our children to study since they may or may not know the value of what we are presenting to them. At times our young children do not listen enough; we blame them for not being “good children” if they do not study; we withdraw our love and attention if our children fail. We associate our children with their grades and we condition education with reward. We tell our children that if they succeed, we’ll buy them some luxury item that they wish to have. Sometimes we buy them nice cars as they graduate. We let our children believe that as soon as they bring home an “A” grade, we’ll do everything for them and that it is their job to bring home an “A.”
Could this be a little bit unhealthy? How? Why do we think this is healthy? Do we do this because our parents raised us this way?
Without doubt many of us were raised to believe that higher education gives us entry to a world of benefits, which is true to a certain extent, yet we forget that the motivation we had or still have in Iran for higher education is different than it is here. We associate status with higher education, which it brings, but how about becoming more humble with more education?
We sometimes cause our children too much of anxiety, which they can not handle. We can get our children do their best performance by encouraging them to work on areas they are best at. We should give love and attention whether our children bring home an A, B, or C.
Our children fail when we fail to parent them.
Our Children succeed when we coach them.
We know that higher education is the key however, a healthy style of life is much more important.
What do I mean by that?
· To raise our children with enough self-esteem to know that they can deal with the daily tasks of life in a proper way.
· To increase our children’s strengths in dealing with conflicts arising in relationships with the outside world in a peaceful way (and we do that, I am sure).
· To help our children to focus on self-awareness, self-understanding, and self acceptance.
· To challenge our own beliefs and to be willing to learn new ideas from our children, our youth, and our young people, who may or may not follow the same path as we have done.
Education is much more than what has been presented to us so far. Our children and our young people need to be life-educated and life-skilled. Teach your son to cook and let your daughter repair cars!
Our children and our teenagers find more success once they can trust that they are accepted for who they are and they WILL BECOME WHO THEY REALLY ARE. The true self will then shine!
September 24, 2007